an open letter to the gathering

friends. you have been much on my mind. and after tim (without prompting and without me sharing what has been on my heart) posted the 'recently read' quote i knew i too had to post something. i speak to you as a sister and a friend. i know these words are nothing knew, and much of them are the words of A. W. Tozer. but ultimately i hope them to be an encouragement to you as you continue in the pursuit of Him and His will for the community.

yesterday i began reading the pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer. lately i have been reading everything in books -cover to cover- foreword, preface, epilogue, etc... and i have been thankful for doing so. you know a book is going to be good if you are already underlining thought after thought in the preface. and so i found myself doing so with the pursuit of God.

first 3 sentences of the preface - in this hour of all-but-universal darkness one cheering gleam appears: within the fold of conservative Christianity there are to be found increasing number of persons who religious lives are marked by a growing hunger after God Himself. they are eager for spiritual realities and will not be put off with words, nor will they be content with correct "interpretations" of truth. they are athirst for God, and they will not be satisfied till they have drunk deep at the Fountain of Living Water.

the above quote captures the heart which drives the gathering - people thirsting after the Lord Himself.

Tozer continues (i will summarize - italics are his words). the problem, however, is in Church there is no lack of teaching on "right" doctrine - fundamentals of the faith - yet there is a lack of Presence. It is a solemn thing, and no small scandal in the kingdom, to see God's children starving while actually seated at the Father's table.

the gathering was birthed out of a disconnect that was occurring between Church and our desire to know God Himself. something wasn't working. starvation was occurring. we were hungry for more.

There are millions of people who hold "right opinions," probably more than ever before in the history of the Church. Yet I wonder if there was ever a time when true spiritual worship was at a lower ebb. To great sections of the Church the art of worship has been lost entirely, and in its place has come the strange and foreign thing called a program.

Sound Bible exposition is an imperative must in the Church of the Living God. Without it no church can be a New Testament church in any strict meaning of the term... but it is not mere words that nourish the soul, but God Himself, and unless and until the hearers find God in personal experience they are not better for having heard the truth.

The Bible is not an end in itself, but a means to bring men and women to an intimate and satisfying knowledge of God, that they may enter into Him and they may delight in His Presence, may taste and know the inner sweetness of the very God Himself in the core and center of their hearts.

more than "right opinions," searching, pursing, loving, worshiping the Lord must be the highest priority.

Tozer goes on to explain the reality of possessing nothing. losing life to find it (Matt 16:25). having everything, but possessing nothing.

we are often hindered from giving up our treasures to the Lord out of fear for their safety. This is especially true when those treasures are loved relatives and friends (our goals/dreams for a community). But we need have no such fears. our Lord came not to destroy but to save. Everything is safe which we commit to Him, and nothing is really safe which is not so committed.

i must be honest with you. i have seen too many people in Church fighting for their own agenda, and in doing so much was lost - not the least of which was the primary focus being the seeking/finding/worshiping of God Himself. and looking back i wonder - where was the sacrifice of self? and what was gained in possessing?

the Lord desires to be known. know Him. the Lord desires to be loved. love Him. the Lord desires and is worthy to be worshiped. worship Him. may this be your focus. may you not be distracted by your own agenda. you own vision.

But seek first His Kingdom all these things will be added unto you as well. Matt. 6:33

i love you all dearly. these words challenge me as i pray they challenge you. give me your thoughts please. Tozer ends his first chapter with this prayer. and i think it is appropriate to close the post with it as well.

O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully conscious of my need of further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be make more thirsty still. Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, that so I may know Thee indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, "Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away." Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long. In Jesus name, Amen

HOME!!

Travel plans have officially been set. yeah! we will be arriving in seattle august 1st - spending time with my fam, adjust back to time in america, resting, celebrating my birthday, and visiting vancouver.

august 12th - we will be in denver!!! we hope to spend some days visiting friends in denver and spending good time with the knipps in the springs.

i am super stoked. the thought of being home and seeing those we love makes me very happy.

recently read

Conversion comes to be thought of as 'being saved'. The accent falls on the privileges of membership in the saved community. The eschatological dimension of the biblical idea of salvation slips out of sight; one forgets that 'being saved' means being made a participant in the mighty saving work of God which is not complete until all things have been summed up in Christ. And in this context, where the Church is seen simply as the exclusive association of those who have been rescued from perdition, an anxious discussion about whether others too might be saved becomes inevitable.

Surely the perspective is wrong. Conversion means being turned round as so to be by faith and in foretaste a participant in and an agent of God's reign. The proper question is not: Are there few that be saved? The question is: Who is doing the will of God?

To claim finality for Jesus Christ is not to assert either that the majority of men will some day be Christians, or to assert that all others will be damned. It is to claim that commitment to him is the way in which men can become truly aligned to the ultimate end for which all things were made.

-Lesslie Newbigin in "The Finality of Christ"

heaven

tim and i just finished the last battle yesterday. i loved the second half of the book and wanted to share some of my favorite quotes with all of you.

"listen peter. when aslan said you could never go back to Narnia, he meant the Narnia you were thinking of. but that was not the real Narnia. that had a beginning and an end. it was only a shadow or a copy of the real Narnia, which has always been here and always will be here: just as our own world, England, and all, is only a shadow or copy of something in aslan's real world. you need not mourn over Narnia, lucy. all of the old Narnia that mattered, all the dear creatures, have been drawn into the real Narnia through the Door. and of course it is different; as different as a real thing is from a shadow or as waking life is from a dream."

"it was the unicorn who summed up what everyone was feeling... 'i have come home at last! this is my real country! i belong here. this is the land i have been looking for all my life, though i never knew it till now. the reason why we loved the old Narnia is that it sometimes looked a little like this. come further up, come further in!"

may we together long a little more for our real home today, as we recognize things on this earth aren't quite the way they should be. let us together see glimpses of our real home in people, places and moments. and may we together strive to create community and life that does its best to mirror the great redemption that is most certainly coming.

or as my favorite cheesy christian song says, "people get ready, jesus is coming, soon we will be going home." :)

answers to questions

here are some answers to comment questions:

coffee - great. i really liked it.
goat cheese - yuck (a good summary of all goat products which we tried on the trip)
wadi dana - reminded us of the Lord of the Rings when frodo and sam are wandering before getting to Mordor

another related comment - we went to the market today and i told tim, "i don't think i can handle meat this week. do you mind if we wait until next week to buy some?" no problem. i purposely didn't put the sheep slaughter pics up. thought i would spare all of you the temptation to become vegetarians. :)

jordan pics

kristi how do you feel about waking up late?...

k and erin. in the back of a truck. headed for the bedouin tent

tk and kurtis are excited about being in the desert where we spent the night
tk gets ups early on day 2 and climbs up high.

tk's view of our camp (bottom right)
driving back the next day
tk and me, with jeff smiling too
kurtis and erin

having coffee in another village
goat cheese...
wadi dana, a view of where we spent our second night


hope you enjoyed the pictures. we had a great time in jordan.

jordan, moment 1

wake up. sunny outside. look at clock. 5:56. supposed to be at the bus at 6:00. oh crap.

change clothes. run. run fast. ahead of tk. hoping the bus hasn't left.

6:11. arrive at bus stop. apologize to everyone for being late. tim arrives 6:13 with our backpack.

6:30. feeling sick on the bus. ask tk for a bag. ask him to get the bag faster. think due to quick up and run.

7:00. feeling better. thanks to a nice soft back rub by tk and trying to relax. didn't get sick. almost but no. and we haven't even had anything sketch to eat.

noon. arrive in jordan.

3:00. watch 2 sheep slaughtered.

4:00. tk fights with kurtis on a rock - screen to camera broken. bummer. (kurtis would like to add he is not responsible for breakage. tim was putting rocks in kurtis' shoes...)

6:30. play rook with kurtis and erin.

8:30. eat sheep.

10:30 - sleep under the stars. outside of a bedouin tent.

day one finished.

today - home safe and sound. going to watch lost with kurtis and erin and ben.

got-to-go. more tomorrow.

jordan

on another note. just wanted to let you all know tomorrow early, early (at the bus at 6:00 am), we are leaving for jordan for 3 days. we will be in the desert. hot, i know. staying with a bedouin family for one night and in a nature reserve park for another night. should be good times. all part of tk's cultural backgrounds of the bible class (which i took while we were here in 2001 and the coolest thing we did then was go to a cultural dinner). and get this, to get to the tents we have to take jeeps. jeeps in the desert, what could be more fun?! so we are pretty excited. don't worry - we will drink lots of water, wear sunscreen and take lots of pictures.

so have a great weekend. pics to come on sunday pm (jerusalem time).

venting

maybe this is dumb but i don't care. i just wanted you all to know i am frustrated with America. America in the sense of all the crazy teenage girls that are voting for jason on American idol. what the heck?! the guy has done (in my opinion) horribly, especially last night. and yet he remains safe on the show. granted carly was my number one girl and i am super bummed that she got kicked off - but i think i am more frustrated that jason remains. the thought crossed my mind to stop watching the show to boycott. but i don't think i will go that far. but please friends if you are voting for jason - stop, or at least explain to me what you see in him musically. he didn't even know the song he sang last night was from Cats until Andrew Loyd Weber told him so. unbelievable. humph.

ok. i am done. i still think carly rocks. and thankfully i think there is no chance in anything that jason will actually win. go brooke. go syesha. go dave. go david. boo jason.

bible study

last night we had our last bible study where we all will be together. jody (far right) is going home tuesday for her graduation. and we wanted some pictures of all of us.
from the left: amanda, molly, me (they wanted me in the middle), christina (in the back), anna, and jody.
fake laugh. classic.
being silly.

it has truly been an honor for me to lead this group of women. each week we have dinner together (we take turns being in charge), we read a few chapters from Matthew and discuss it, one of us shares our story and finish with a time of prayer. i am deeply touched each week by their insight, vulnerability, care for one another, excitement to be together and passion to seek the Lord and their love for Him. i told them last night that i believe they are each in a very special time in their relationship with the Lord. there is something miraculous that happens when we leave home and claim our relationship with Him for our own, separate from our families. and I know that He desires to speak deep into their hearts and minds about who they are as treasured, sought after, loved, daughters of the King. I am thankful for the Lord's work in their lives and for this opportunity to continue to speak His truth to them. and He has used them to bless me as well.

we will have two more times together. i would continue to covet your prayers for those times and for the Lord to continue to reveal His love to each one.

tk goes to school...

for those of you who voted for long hair - just wanted you to know this is how tim went to take his physical settings final today. haha. he said something like not feeling like putting on a hat. haha.

forgiveness

forgiveness means that i continually am willing to forgive the other person for not being God - for not fulfilling all my needs.

henri nouwen

i appreciated reading this earlier today - thought you might all too.

thought you all might too appreciate that currently my feet are covered in vaseline and wrapped in plastic. franswa suggested it to me to help with my dry feet - apparently she does this all the time. i took some pictures but i thought they all looked weired. will let you know how it goes.

7 years

7 years tomorrow. that's how long tk and i have been together. crazy. and good. just wanted you all to know. :)

the night we started dating i came back to nico's and my room at JUC to find a sweet sticky note from her, which i still have in my journal from 2001 - says something like, "good night friend. hope you had a nice talk with tk. can't wait to hear all about it."

tim and i actually kept our dating a secret for a few days. and only told nicole and mike. the night we "revealed" our dating we were with our friends headed to the new city to join in on the independence of israel festivities. tk and i stayed back holding hands, while nicole and mike prompted them all to look back at us. poor mike. he got such a hard time. bekah and i still laugh at the scolding she gave him.

good memories. maybe tk and i will even go out for iced coffees from aromas (icy romas we used to call them... i think) to celebrate. the very drinks we got on our first date as a couple. sigh.

ok enough. enough. i think too much time at school has got me a little bored. :)

beach day

we had a great day saturday with erin and kurtis on the beach in tel aviv. made it home to watch juno and have dinner together. today tim and i are at school where he is working away at his intertestamental lit paper. go tim.

the smiths and other life

tim and i had dinner with carolyn and conley smith last night. here we are outside the restaurant. it was wonderful to be with them. they are dear friends of my great uncle jim here on tour.
new black boots. yeah!
new hair cut thanks to jamil!!

an attempt at an artistic shot of the top :)

ALSO -ken created a blog to display the over 50 hats he received in the past few weeks - check it out!! http://www.kenslids.blogspot.com/

tomorrow we are going to the beach!! sunday we will be studying, well tim will be studying. have a great weekend one and all.

the many faces of tk

tim forgot camera. borrowed kurtis'. lull time on a field study. decided to leave kurtis a photograph montage present. too funny not to share.

life of pi

i am reading life of pi right now. erin loaned it to me. after the first 75 pages or so it has me hooked and i am almost done. tk and i have had a relaxing morning. he is off to class now. but i wanted to share these quotes from my time of reading -

faith in God is an opening up, a letting go, a deep trust, a free act of love - but sometimes it is so hard to love.

the blackness would stir and eventually go away, and God would remain, a shining point of light in my heart. i would go on loving.

yann martel

jordan part two

we are home. a little tired but thankful for such a great time in jordan. 4 very full days. here is just a glance...

remains at ammon

jerash (nt gerasa)



yeah for coke! great treat to end the day (now a 4 hour bus trip down to petra)
andrew - even though you all don't know him i thought this picture was too funny not to include.

petra - the treasury
the monastery
hiking back to the bus through a wadi with lots of obstacles...
on the bus :)
day 4 on mt. nebo

with the girls on my bible study who are in our physical settings class (from the left - amanada, anna, me, molly, christina)

this trip was a wonderful end to a extremely memorable class. crazy to believe the semester is coming to a close. in two weeks we will be back in jordan for tim's cultural backgrounds of the bible class. i will post more stories and things tomorrow. time for bed.